The interferometric signals produced in conventional dual-comb laser ranging require femtosecond lasers with long-term carrier-envelope offset frequency stability, and are limited to an upper sampling rate by radio-frequency aliasing considerations. By using cross-polarized dual combs and two-photon detection, we demonstrate carrier-phase-insensitive cross-correlations at sampling rates of up to 12× the conventional dual-comb aliasing limit, recording these in a digitizer-based acquisition system to implement ranging with sub-100 nm precision. We then extend this concept to show how the high data burden of conventional dual-comb acquisition can be eliminated by using a simple microcontroller as a ns-precision stopwatch to record the time intervals separating the two-photon cross-correlation pulses, providing real-time and continuous LiDAR-like distance metrology capable of sub-100 nm precision and dynamic acquisition for unlimited periods.