Complex systems are challenging to control because the system responds to the controller in a nonlinear fashion, often incorporating feedback mechanisms. Interdependence of systems poses additional difficulties, as cross-system connections enable malicious activity to spread between layers, increasing systemic risk. In this paper we explore the conditions for an optimal control of cascading failures in a system of interdependent networks. Specifically, we study the Bak-Tang-Wiesenfeld sandpile model incorporating a control mechanism, which affects the frequency of cascades occurring in individual layers. This modification allows us to explore sandpile-like dynamics near the critical state, with supercritical region corresponding to infrequent large cascades and subcritical zone being characterized by frequent small avalanches. Topological coupling between networks introduces dependence of control settings adopted in respective layers, causing the control strategy of a given layer to be influenced by choices made in other connected networks. We find that the optimal control strategy for a layer operating in a supercritical regime is to be coupled to a layer operating in a subcritical zone, since such condition corresponds to reduced probability of inflicted avalanches. However this condition describes a parasitic relation, in which only one layer benefits. Second optimal configuration is a mutualistic one, where both layers adopt the same control strategy. Our results provide valuable insights into dynamics of cascading failures and and its control in interdependent complex systems.