This paper describes a novel synthetic approach for the conversion of zero-valent copper metal into a conductive two-dimensional layered metal-organic framework (MOF) based on 2,3,6,7,10,11-hexahydroxytriphenylene (HHTP) to form Cu3(HHTP)2. This process enables patterning of Cu3(HHTP)2 onto a variety of flexible and porous woven (cotton, silk, nylon, nylon/cotton blend, and polyester) and non-woven (weighing paper and filter paper) substrates with microscale spatial resolution. The method produces conductive textiles with sheet resistances of 0.1-10.1 MΩ/cm2, depending on the substrate, and uniform conformal coatings of MOFs on textile swatches with strong interfacial contact capable of withstanding chemical and physical stresses, such as detergent washes and abrasion. These conductive textiles enable simultaneous detection and detoxification of nitric oxide and hydrogen sulfide, achieving part per million limits of detection in dry and humid conditions. The Cu3(HHTP)2 MOF also demonstrated filtration capabilities of H2S, with uptake capacity up to 4.6 mol/kgMOF. X-ray photoelectron spectroscopy and diffuse reflectance infrared spectroscopy show that the detection of NO and H2S with Cu3(HHTP)2 is accompanied by the transformation of these species to less toxic forms, such as nitrite and/or nitrate and copper sulfide and Sx species, respectively. These results pave the way for using conductive MOFs to construct extremely robust electronic textiles with multifunctional performance characteristics.